A failure to make the cut is manageable, ten failures, one after another, they begin to impact our ability to cope, a hundred failures overwhelm us. Credit: Bill de Blasio-2011. We started to identify ourselves as losers. Mentally turn our failures into a pattern and begin to believe that the problem is us: we simply can not make the grade. We are not able to look at the situation objectively: that each job application as a dice roll, or the attraction of a machine tragaperrasmanejar, is a completely independent event, with opportunities that do not change with multiple repetitions. The fact that he was not offered a particular position says nothing except another applicant was a better fit. It is not a trial on me like a whole person, not even as an employee or prospective employee. For a thousand reasons, the chemistry was not right. Watch how your mind does not really accept that as it sinks into the guilt and self-doubt, repeating all the negative tapes that has ever developed, trying to make you look like a permanent loser.
Using the same powerful conscious mind to focus on their positive attributes. Think, or better yet, write, all his successes, large and small. Mentally explore your life, looking for all the times you were a winner in everything from a good grade in a difficult subject to successful rearing of a child scoring a goal, marrying your spouse. Reassure yourself of your value, frequently and finally help transform your mind into a source of support rather than an internal enemy that repeatedly cuts below. Rejection is always difficult, but the pain may be more fleeting when we refuse to allow one, or a hundred, rejections to define ourselves as waste material. Virginia Bola operated a rehabilitation company for 20 years, the development of innovative job search for disabled workers, while serving as a professional expert in Administrative Law, Civil and Workers' Compensation Courts. Author of an interactive and supportive workbook, The Wolf at the Door: An Unemployment Survival Manual, and a monthly ezine, border workers, who can be reached at